i don't know whats wrong with me.
im an emotional mess,
and a giant ball of stress.
im always moody,
and short tempered.
i need a change.
all of my life i have been horrible at making important decisions.
decisions that will affect my life scare the shit out of me.
the idea of applying to schools in a couple months makes me feel like im going to puke.
and i know drew wants to move.
i know he doesn't want to live in london, and would love to be in kitchener.
im scared to leave.
london is what i know .
but i feel trapped.
and i feel uninspired here
and i don't feel like i will be able to accomplish anything in a city that leaves me so un-enthused (sp?).
im rambling.
but i have to do it somewhere.
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1 comment:
melissa, asmuch i would like to tell you you're rediculous i know that isn't going to help the situation.
You have always been the strongest most level headed one out of all of us... if there even is an us anymore. big decisions can be scary, yes, but you have a really great life. and you do very well for yourself. and you keep up a stellar relationship with drew and still find time for your friends and your family.
I know you're stressed, you do work a lot. but maybe moving out of London wouldn't be too bad. Getting comfortable somewhere, in a job, in a city... anywhere really can be nice.
but it can also be dangerous.
Change has to happen. you can't stop it from happening, and the way i always look at it is you can either make changes for yourself or wait for change to happen.
And i personally, would rather be able to control it then have to deal with the outcome of something i wasn't prepared for.
You're amazing.
and if you ever need anything... you know where i am.
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